Yesterday in the shower I became suspicious that more hair was falling out than does for a normal person. I know, I'm not really normal, but then, who is? So today Jason and I took a stroll to our friendly neighborhood grocery store and perused the offerings of hair gel. Jason is the hair-gunk-expert-in-residence today. After some analysis, during which I discovered that there are more hair products out there than I care to know about, we selected Dep ("It's Every Man's Style) Sport X-treme Vertical Glue 12 Extreme Hold Spike Grip Concrete Cement and, in case that wasn't enough, Aussie Instant Freeze Hair Spray (No Worries Guarantee; Radiant Hair in One Use) Extreme Hold. Amazingly enough, the back of the hairspray reads, "Whoa, Nelly! (your hair's name is Nelly, right?) Take the reins and put a super-hold on your magnificent mane." Who could pass that up?

You see, I had promised certain daughters that I would let them (gulp) play with my mohawk. But I felt I must first fortify myself with french fries from the friendly neighborhood fast-food joint. I made some comment about my hair, and Mrs. R came out from behind the grill to extend her condolences over the loss of my locks. She said she used to recognize me on the street because of my hair, and it seemed like she still would be able to. They are such nice people.

Bethany did the gelling. She decided I had succumbed just in time, because every time she finished one section and took her hands away, her palms were covered with hair. After the gel came the hair dryer, then the hairspray, and then more blowdrying. When I was done, my hair felt like plastic. It stood up, though. [picture forthcoming when i find it]

Of course, the fun kept going because Reuben wanted to go to the park, so on the way Suzanne saw me and couldn't believe I'd actually gotten a mohawk, much less let my daughters make it plastic. I kind of like having a mohawk. It's a lot less work, probably because there's a lot less hair, and I think I look pretty good. Not that I'm humble or anything. Besides, my dangly earrings show to advantage.